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Underwear in a twist
In the latest Washington Post National Weekly Edition we learn that sales of men's underwear are regarded in some circles as useful for economic forecasting.  (Here, as in most of semiliterate America, "underwear" is a euphemism for "underpants" and is construed as plural.)  It seems that in hard times men are likely to economize on underwear particularly.  As an example, we are told that a certain 59-year-old in Maryland "usually buys new boxers every three months or so in maroon, black or white.  But...he hasn't bought a new pair of underwear in at least eight months."

What possible lifestyle would cause one to wear out a pair of boxer shorts in 3 months?  Is fashion at work?  Would the poor fellow be giggled at in the locker room if seen putting on maroon underpants when black ones were in style?

There is no end to the foolishness of this world.